Moss, is humor writer from Tennessee. She writes a
weekly human interest column about daily life and the funny
things that happen to everyone.
She has written for the Daily News of Kingsport, Griffin Journal,
Oakridge Now, Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton
Advocate, and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News
Journal. She has been
published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks
at Guidepost Books. Her articles have appeared in
numerous anthologies and other publications, both in print and online.
She is a
former board member and past Editor of the Columnists.com, website of the National Society of Newspaper
oldest and largest professional organization
for columnists. She is the Web Editor of
Humorists.com and a founder of the Southern Humorists writers'
organization. She is writer, editor, and webmaster of HumorColumnist.com.
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Online Since 1999
seems every time I turn on the TV, someone is cooking something. I
don't really want any cooking lessons. Been there -- done that -- as
the saying goes.
Some people lament that they can't cook. I guess it would worry me if
I couldn't boil water without burning the pot, but since I do know
how, it doesn't matter. In case you care, the way to keep a pot from
burning is to watch it. The old adage about a "watched pot"
is absolutely true.
On TV's Hell's Kitchen the expert cooks are always burning things,
leaving them raw, or not timing things right to be ready with the rest
of the meal.
Timing is everything and one of the hardest things to learn. I've had
my share of burned beans, lumpy gravy, and raw chicken. But somehow
cooking food correctly pales in comparison to getting the mashed
potatoes and gravy done at the same time.
If you are persistent in your efforts, sooner or later things will
come together and you will learn to cook. Thank goodness when I was a
young bride, my husband was willing to eat all my mistakes and not
complain. I think he figured if you can't do better, don't criticize.
Now I prefer to cook dishes with only three ingredients, or packaged
and frozen. Somehow when you know you can cook if you have to, it
doesn't seem as important.
I remember taking a home economics class in school at some point of
life. We learned to make a basic white sauce, something like white
gravy. The home ec teacher told us white sauce is basic and any good
cook needed to know how to make it. Funny, I don't remember ever
having to a need to cook a white sauce since that class.
Microwave cooking was probably the downfall of real, stovetop food.
Everything is instant. It can be done the old way with flour, salt,
measuring cups and hours in preparation. But why??
Some people call themselves gourmet cooks and take great pride in
cooking hard-to-succeed dishes. Somehow I always get the feeling that
they seldom cook meals. They are not in for the long haul, meal after
meal, day after day. Long-term cooking sucks the pleasure right out of
Some men like to cook. My honey lived single for a long time, but
suddenly he has forgotten everything he ever knew and depends on me to
cook. He claims he lived all those single years on hot dogs.
My recipe books have yellowed pages and are seldom used. If I really
need a recipe for anything, I look it up on the internet. Some of my
best recopies, and the only ones I use now, came from a microwave
cooking class. I didn't learn much about microwave cooking there.
Some of my friends tell me that if it doesn't have the magic word
"microwavable" on it, they don't buy it. I'm not quite that
bad but I do find myself turning to instant food more often. Women
work outside the home now and don't have hours to slave away fixing
So, if you are hungry and want a good, homemade meal, come on over and
see me. I'll take you to Cracker Barrel. You can pay the tab.
Copyright 2011 Sheila Moss
Nashville, TN 37219
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