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Meet the Columnist

Columnist, Sheila Moss, is a free-lance writer from  Tennessee. She writes  funny stuff about southern life, women's issues, family matters and anything else that  she finds amusing.

She is seen weekly in the Daily News of Kingsport, Griffin Journal  and Hill Country Times and appears in a monthly humor publication called Foolish Times.  She has written for  Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton Advocate,  and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News Journal. She has been published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks at Guidepost Books have recently published a number of her articles in their Let There Be Laughter series of books. Her articles have appeared in numerous other publications, both print and online.

She is a board member and the Web Editor of  Columnists.com, website of  the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, the oldest and largest professional organization for  news columnists. She is also the Web Editor of Southern
Humorists.com
  as well as a founder of the Southern Humorists writers organization and this website, Humor
Columnist.com

To carry her self- syndicated weekly column in your newspaper, or to republish an article, please contact her. It's that easy.


 
Sheila Moss


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Rubber Bands....
 


Rubber Bands are the Latest Fad

The latest fad among the elementary school set is – would you believe – the rubber band. Now the rubber bands they are going gaga over are not the ordinary brownish ones that probably come to mind when you think rubber band -- or even the pretty red and green ones that you sometime see. These are colorful rubber bands, but what makes them special is their shape.  They are shaped like chickens, ducks, dinosaurs, elephants or just about any other animal or object you can think of.

I was first introduced to them when my grandson came in with a few of them. It seems the kids at school were going nuts over farm and zoo shaped rubber bands. When I asked “why”, the answer was “why not?” They are cute, cheap, and best of all, “when you stretch them, they return to the original animal shape.” Of course, that makes perfect sense, at least to a child.

It seems that the kids take them to school, trade them with friends for harder to find rubber bands, and wear them on their wrist or arm. My grandson wanted more of these miraculous rubber bands. We couldn’t find them locally and resorted to ordering them on the internet. He spent half of his birthday money to order several batches and couldn’t wait until the big brown truck arrived with them.

Now, I never thought I would be party to such foolishness as collecting animal shaped rubber bands.  But then I remembered Beanie Babies.  Remember how we chased all over town to find the one Beanie Baby that was in high demand?  Where are Beanie Babies now?  Forgotten in the bottom of a dresser drawer? That’s where mine are, I think.

Anyhow, the lowly rubber band has come into its own. Remember when every newspaper was secured with a rubber band before it was delivered to your home? Now they come in plastic bags. Or how strawberries came in plastic crates covered by cellophane secured with a rubber band?  Now they come in plastic boxes.  You may still find your celery or broccoli secured with a rubber band, but the rubber band has become what is called a “mature product”, meaning the demand for them is not increasing.

Almost everyone has a few rubber bands around a door knob or stashed in a kitchen drawer with the scissors and paperclips. Any office worker can find a few rubber bands in the desk drawer, so handy for holding together a pile of file folders or a stack of letters.  In fact, rubber bands are so useful for letters that the Post Office is said to be the largest user of this handy item.  It was the Post Office that came up with the idea for coloring them red due to postal workers dropping them and forgetting to pick them up.

The history of rubber bands is almost as old as the history of rubber itself, which goes back to the time of Columbus who discovered it being used by Mayan Indians.  After the Europeans found out about rubber, it wasn’t too long before the sticky substance was vulcanized into a useful product when Goodyear accidentally mixed rubber with sulfur by leaving it on a hot stove and forgetting it.  Fortunate for him that rubber was not explosive when mixed with sulfur or we would be driving cars with wooden wheels now. 

Anyhow, all is well that ends well.  Along with the dozens of other rubber products, someone invented rubber bands by covering a hollow tube with rubber and then cutting the rubber into strips.  Now we have thick and thin, long and short, plain and colorful rubber bands for any use you can think of – even for kids to collect, trade, and wear on their arms.  New shapes are coming out all the while, cars, flowers, hearts, anything you can think of. The more unusual the shape, the more in demand it is. 

It seems to me that I recall rubber bands being used for slingshots to shoot paper wads when I was a kid. I’m certainly not going to mention that to my grandson.  Obviously, times have changed and I don’t want him to come up with any new (old) ideas to get in trouble with.

But rubber bands? Who could imagine that rubber bands would be the next big fad?


Copyright 2001 Sheila Moss

 
 



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