Moss, is humor writer from Tennessee. She writes a
weekly human interest column about daily life and the funny
things that happen to everyone.
She has written for the Daily News of Kingsport, Griffin Journal,
Oakridge Now, Atlanta Woman Magazine, Aberdeen Examiner, Angleton
Advocate, and Smyrna AM, a supplement of the Murfreesboro Daily News
Journal. She has been
published by Voyageur Press, McGraw Hill, and the good folks
at Guidepost Books. Her articles have appeared in
numerous anthologies and other publications, both in print and online.
She is a
former board member and past Editor of the Columnists.com, website of the National Society of Newspaper
oldest and largest professional organization
for columnists. She is the Web Editor of
Humorists.com and a founder of the Southern Humorists writers'
organization. She is writer, editor, and webmaster of HumorColumnist.com.
To carry her weekly column in your
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Online Since 1999
||My Cat Can Fly...
My Cat Can Fly
cat can fly.
Less you be confused, my cat cannot fly like a bird.
Misty flies more like Superman, minus the cape, that is, leaping
tall buildings in a single bound. All cats can jump, of
course, but Misty seems to have extraordinary abilities in this
particular feline skill.
Misty has always preferred high places. As a kitten, she
climbed the curtains to the top of the living room curtains,
where she paced back and forth with the cat-footed precision of
a tightrope walker, surveying the mortal world below.
As she became older and stronger, she simply bounded in a long
graceful leap from the back of a chair to the top of the
curtains. She then took her afternoon power nap on the top
of a nearby hutch that could be reached in an easy jump from the
Misty had an instinctive love for the top of the world.
She looked at other tall places with longing eyes, wondering how
she could surmount the distances.
Her next conquest was the kitchen china cabinet. It was
simply a matter of leaping from the table, a place she was not
allowed to be. But risking human wrath was of little consequence
when aiming for a lofty goal. The china cabinet quickly
became a new favorite nesting spot for her afternoon nap. But
even in the lap of contentment she became restless and longed
for taller mountains to climb.
The living room had an entertainment center so tall it was
nearly to the ceiling. Misty surveyed it with squinted yellow
eyes, but the leap was too far, the risk of embarrassment too
great. She could see the Promised Land, but could not
Then one day, she discovered that by bouncing from a low wall by
the doorway, she could – maybe – accelerate herself to the
top of the coveted piece of furniture. It was a miraculous
feat, a leap that required gliding over 6 feet in the air.
Unafraid, she sailed to the top of the entertainment center,
landing with sure-footed precision.
Once she found that she could do it, there was no stopping her.
She now soared to the top of the china hutch from newly found,
and more challenging, jump-off spots. If a human happened
to walk by when she was ready to leap, she would jump right over
the top of their surprised head.
From the entertainment center, she flew to the drapery rod.
From there she soared to the hutch, and finally to the one
remaining place where she had not yet set foot, a twin hutch on
the other side of the fireplace. Mortals could scarcely
believe their eyes the day they saw her defy gravity to leap
over the entire width of the fireplace and land on new terrain.
The top of the refrigerator and the top of kitchen cabinets were
minor conquests for a cat that could fly. She hardly
bothered with them at all, preferring more challenging places
where she could soar from furniture top to furniture top, aloof
and safe, high above the earthbound world of mere humans.
Misty spent her days lounging on her back, sometimes
precariously close to the edge of disaster, while daydreaming of
rooftops, hot air balloons, para-sailing and rocket ships to
outer space. If NASSA accepted cats, it’s certain she
would apply to be an astrocat.
Being a young and daring cat, Misty possesses the strength and
prowess that enabled these miraculous leaps, along with the
fearless spirit of youth that has not experienced failure.
She has not yet learned what is impossible and, therefore,
should not be attempted.
Downward plunges when she jumps from top of her lofty perches
are merely a fast lane to the floor. She defies gravity as she
glides through the air with a graceful feline confidence that
eludes earthbound creatures who can only watch in awe.
Misty can fly.
Copyright 2008 Sheila Moss
Nashville, TN 37219
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